Ned Flandersessesessses

"Ned Flanders: [surprised by the pink mutated multi-eyed squirrel] Well, this certainly seems odd, but, heh, who am I to question the work of the Almighty? Oh, we thank you Lord for this mighty fine intelligent design! Good job!" - IMDB. Some of you know the incredibly hilarious work of Matt Groening, the creator of the Simpsons. And if you don't, it's an animated show about a hyper dysfunctional family - The Simpsons. A main character of the show is the main families next door neighbor ... Ned Flanders. Ned is the epitome of a goody-two-shoes. He never curses, goes to church every Sunday, wears his mustache proudly and is absolutely devout. At times even more so than the town minister - Reverend Lovejoy. Naturally the main character Homer Simpson hates his neighbor, primarily because Ned is everything Homer isn't. 

So in all honesty, is Ned Flanders an accurate representation of a Christian? I have to say, partly, yeah. There are all kinds of stigma's out there about Christians. And to be fair, I'm really sick of being associated with "ignorant bigots."  I have been called that by people I don't know based solely on the fact that I am a follower of Jesus. Okay things just got real up in here people!  ... She said "Jesus" which is right up there with the F-Bomb!! Sweet Mercy! I'm embarrassed, is she gonna preach to me? What is this blog turning INTO?!?!

Okay woah ... take a breath .... iiiiinnnn and ooouuutt. Better? Great. No. I'm not going to preach, possibly teach, but definitely not preach. I'm also not going to throw Christianity down your throat. The SOLE purpose of this post is to hopefully shed some light on Christianity and religion, answer questions you MAY have and if nothing else, enlighten you. Even if Jesus isn't your thing, please finish this post. It's not too long, and you may just learn something!

There is a lot of talk about Christians and Christianity these days, especially with things like gay marriage on the ballot, it's turning into a bit of a he said she said all out war out there. Makes me sad. Sad to see so much hate back and forth. And in that battle (that I'm not really a part of) I end up being called names I don't deserve to be called which makes me very sad and a little angry to be frank. Now I can't go into everything with you today or this blog post would be about a thousand pages long and lets face facts, no one can tolerate that much of me. But here are some simple basics for those of you not "in the know."

First of all God loves everyone. Let's put that misnomer to bed right here and now. There are 2 kinds of Christians in the world, the minority of LOUD extremists who twist the truth to fit their ideals. THIS is the face of current Christianity and it's not right. They do NOT accurately reflect what and who God is. Then there is the MAJORITY of silent Christians. Those of us who believe in the Love, Peace, Joy, Grace, Mercy, Love, Power, Authority, Love, Kindness, Caring, Generosity, and Love of God. We believe these things, but because of the loud minority and those who do not want to know Christians as anything else, we are not heard. God's love cannot be heard above the noise. The noise of stigma, the noise of hatred, the noise of politics - too much noise. Or we do not speak up because we are too terrified of being persecuted based on the aforementioned stigma and being called an "ignorant fool" for saying that God loves everyone no exceptions. (That actually happened once, I'm not kidding.) So if you are gay, straight, single, married, happy, sad, divorced, lonely, devoted, lost, found, homeless, friendless, helpless, hopeless ... God loves you. He sees you no matter who you are, or where you are and He loves you beyond any love you could ever know in this life. The beauty of it is that there is probably no more IMPERFECT person that walks this earth than me. I mess up like it's my job ... pretty much literally. And the truth that I must face is that NO MATTER WHAT I DO ... God loves me. Doesn't matter if I don't like what I see in the mirror; hate my voice, hate my hair, hate my varicose veins before 30, hate my stomach, hate my ears, hate hate hate ...  God loves. He made me. He created everything about me JUST EXACTLY the way He wanted me. If nothing else that makes me take pause right there. To know I hate me and it makes my God sad. If I hate me and it makes Him sad, how do you think He feels when we hate each other????  God is Love. Even if you don't learn anything else in this post, know that.

Next. I've been told I'm an idiot because I told someone that Atheism is a religion. Well, I went to a Liberal Arts College and took 2 Religion classes there and learned a TON about many different religions, including my own. Hate to break it to you, but 2 Ph.D's of religion and apparently whomever wrote and published our text books agreed, Atheism is the belief in nothing - no God, no higher power, nothing. The definition of religion is the belief in something. Even if that belief is in nothing ... it's still a belief, thus making Atheism a religion. So if you denounce religion and consider yourself an Atheist ... know that you are still a religion. Just a fact. I didn't make the rules, I'm just followin em.

I may be the last man standing on this, but the Bible is a historical document. Yeah, I know, silly crazy Christie, there she goes again! So let's think this one through a little bit. There are sections of the current standard Bible - Old Testament and New Testament. The Old Testament is the section before Jesus, the NEW Testament tells about Jesus and what Christians believe - the Gospel or "Good News" about Jesus. (If you want to learn more about Jesus, I encourage you to pick up, borrow or download a Bible and skip on down to the New Testament and read about him. You can also use a new fangled thing called The Internets and Google you some Christ! Beware, that might not bring you the most accurate information, but if nothing else it's a start!) Now a lot of the Old Testament takes place - like it's a play or something - in or around Egypt. Mostly due to the fact that there was a time in history when the Egyptians used the Jews as slaves. Thanks to archeologists - The Indiana Jones's of the world we know that the Egyptians were master record keepers. They liked to write so much they invented paper - papyrus, processed palm leaves. They also had dudes called Scribes. Since not everyone in that day could write, it was considered a skill, there was a specific job just for people to walk around and write stuff down. No I'm not kidding. This was a time of the original tablet ... of stone. So they would go about and follow people around and write everything they said and did down, roll it up, and put it in storage. So back to the Bible, well we know that many of the passages of the Bible are accurate because we can compare them with official Egyptian records of the Pharaoh from the same time. They reflect the same dates, names and cities. Sometimes the actual event details can look a little different depending on who wrote it, but let's face facts, there are always 2 sides to every story - am I right? Needless to say, scholars have been able to verify much of the Bible  using other official documents from the Egyptians or the Romans who were ALSO amazing at writin stuff down. In fact, it's the Romans who killed Jesus, and they're the one's who wrote all that stuff down for us about the who, what, where, when, why etc. So thanks Romans! There are also sections of the Bible that are written in the form of a letter from one person to another or a set of people's. These letters were written down and saved, passed down for generations, collected and compiled. I will say that sometimes passages talk about our beliefs or personal stories or even prophecies - things that are less tangible, but never the less, the historical accuracy of the Bible shouldn't be discounted. Just somethin to think about and hopefully read about.

Lastly, if you are a skeptic, which many people are, I understand. If I'm honest and truthful with myself, which I'm often not - no Christie, that shirt does NOT accentuate your fupa! - I've had doubts about God myself. There are so many things that happen in this world and in our lives that sometimes it feels like God can't be real. If He was the world would be a perfect place. Our God is a loving and faithful God and made a promise to every one of us - believer or not - that He would always be there for us. Hurt with us, cry with us, comfort us, love us and never ever ever leave us. Even when we turn our back on Him, or have never known about Him, He is always there. Because He is our creator, our "Father", and He fulfills His promises. It has been proven in the past, and if we open our eyes to it, He does now too. The thing about belief is that it's tricky. God doesn't make Himself known in burning bushes that aren't consumed, or show up at the local watering hole in the form of a person like He did in the past. He's not that visible because He doesn't need to be. We need to be faithful without having seen or touched. And in an overstimulated society where if it doesn't look real we're unamused, that can be a hard thing. Which is why the reward is that much sweeter. I live my life with so much less stress, worry, hate, anger, fear, doubt, and anxiety because of my God.

Ned Flanders gets flack from Homer all the time about living such a tight life. Flanders lives in fear of going to hell so does everything including the impossible (it's a cartoon) to ensure that doesn't happen. But in doing so, he often DOES reflect a good Christian. He teaches his children about God and love, makes sure they are kind, treats Homer like he would want himself to be treated - even though Homer is consistent in his antagonizing, he is a community leader and is caring and compassionate toward others. These are the things that I wish more people could see. Instead of viewing all Christians as "do-gooder, ignorant, bigoted, fools" I wish we were considered the kindhearted, generous, caring, joyful, loving, voice of reason.

If you have more questions on Christianity, and I sincerely hope you do, here is a GREAT book for beginning your investigation: The Case For Christ by Lee Strobel. He was an Atheist who set out to completely disprove God, and during his quest became a Christian because of the undeniable evidence he found. This may not be the case for you, but it is an excellent resource for information and intellectual insights.

Lastly, please remember 2 things. First, God is Love. Second Christians aren't perfect - no one is. We try our imperfect best to put a little good into the world which is what God wants. And to be honest, we make mistakes. But that should not be a reason to write off an entire religion or lump a huge group of people (2.18 Billion Christians) into one little category. We are not all the same but true Christians should set somewhat of an example of how to live a joy filled, happy, loving life by caring for those around them. Doesn't mean they won't slip up, we're all human ... but it does mean if we have that happiness inside, we should try to spread it.

Hope this addressed at least SOME of the stigma associated with Christianity and that if you are not a follower of Christ, you would be open to educating yourself further on what that means - even if you never consider yourself a follower, it would be handy to have all the facts.

Thanks for listening ... er uh I mean reading and I sincerely hope this brought some light and insight into your life.