Whatever Happened To The Take?

I'm sure that if you're like me and watch way too many movies, you're thinking that title has something to do with a heist. You know, "The Take" from theft. The score, the loot, the well yeah okay I think you get it. But that's actually not what I'm talking about as I know nothing about thievery. Except of course that I am a professional thief because I have seen The Italian Job AND The Thomas Crown Affair. Also all the Ocean's movies and that one with Katherine Zeta Jones and Sean Connery. #expertstatus

But back to topic. What ever happened to the take? The take I'm referring to here is the take part of the "Give & Take" in a relationship. It's the advice that all married couples give to newly wed couples - "marriage is a give and take!" Except no one ever wants to take. Why is that? Is it because take is perceived as selfish? Do we only ever want to appear as the giver of the relationship?? Do we not realize then that makes our partner only a taker. Negative connotation!

My husband is literally a super hero. Maybe you've heard of him? In previous posts perhaps. Or well, pretty much only a small handful of people I know actually read the ridiculous thoughts put to computer screen, so maybe you know him. He literally has changed the world. (Not kidding, when he was in Ecuador on a missions trip, he made soccer goals for the kids in the village/area they were in and the organization that headed the trip asked for his plans and building materials because they were/are going to use it globally ... world changed.) Most people don't realize but there is nothing he can't do - except interact with humans - but that's totally besides the point! He can do carpentry (he built our daughters crib FROM SCRATCH), electric - I stand by with a 2x4 just in case, plumbing - we won't count the time he dripped MOLTEN metal (solder - pronounced saudder) IN his mouth ... I flipped out way more than he did. He can literally fix technical problems OVER THE PHONE - what are you a magician freak?! WHO DOES THAT?! Not even tech support can do that! And don't get me started on cars, outdoor power equipment and anything else with a motor ... #mechanicalengineer. But seriously, this kid is amazing. He's also very kindhearted and doesn't want to ever leave anyone hanging if they are in need of help. My point with all of this? He's what you might call in HIGH DEMAND. Our house is kind of like a revolving door for him. He comes home to leave again to play super hero to or for someone. Which is great. Truly. But, after years of this, it gets hard.

Yep. I said it. It's hard. It's hard being the feeble Lois Lane who can't do anything with out her Hero Superman, even though he's out reversing the Earth's orbit to turn back time to stop Lex Luther from blowing up the world.

I kinda feel bad for Lois. First of all, Lois is not my most favorite woman's name - sorry. Second of all, she really isn't a character without Clark/Superman. She never seems to be able to do anything for herself and acts more as an Achilles heal for Superman because of his love for her. All the villains know to go straight for her. And that's what I am. Lois here. Hangin out watching Superman save the world only to have problems of my own that only complicate his life. That's hard to admit.When you are a significant other, you like to think you bring something meaningful to the table. Even things out, make the relationship balanced. But in our world, that's just not the case. I'm home all day, pregnant like a crazy lady, with a massive beast thing we call a dog and a 3 1/2 year old. Doin stuff, but not changing the world. Some say, right but some day maybe your kids will! And that would be incredible - still not me. That would be them and I would be proud, but not responsible.

Since I got pregnant (with Twins ... WHAT?!) I've seen a lot of t-shirts and stuff for moms and one says "I grow Twins, What's Your Super Power?" While hilarious, and almost a purchase, it's also not really true. Given the right circumstances, many women can "grow" twins. In fact, many already have. It's not really a super power. It's more like a really neat capability. Hey look at me, I'm getting 3 kids in 2 shots. Also a blessing. But keeping beings alive isn't a super power either. Anyone can do it - even my husband. He might do it weird and extremely messily, and it does not fall into his favorites folder, but he can do it. (Told ya he can do anything!)

So -  back to the topic at hand here rambler! The take. So it seems that I would need to be the giver. Giving support and encouragement for the Superhero. But while I'm not a hero, I am human. And humans have needs. Yeah ... weird ... but we totally do. One of those is taking care of ourselves. One of the things you learn if you become a Lifeguard is that you have to pay attention and focus because if something happens to you during a rescue - what good are you to the victim you're trying to save? You're not. And now there are 2 people in trouble. That's why when people are drowning there are certain techniques and maneuvers used to complete a successful rescue. Those must be applied to keep both parties safe. The same goes in life, if you don't take care of yourself, what good are you to anyone else? While child caring and rearing might not be as powerful as changing the world like my Superman, it's needed for our family to survive. Mostly due to the fact that Jay can't change the world if he's busy changing diapers. (See what I did there? With the changing thing ... whatever guys I'm funny!) On the same note, I need to do things for me sometimes in order to stay remotely sane. I'm completely crazy mind you, but to stay in the realm of reality I need something for me. Sure I have this neat little blog, but it takes energy, research and time to do. I'm usually pretty tired after writing a post and then it still must be read several dozen times and edited etc.

So if I know this is needed, I believe it - says it in the Bible - even God rested, why do I feel guilty when I ask for something for me? Why is there such a stigma with taking? It even sounds like a dirty word - TAKE. Most of the time I have to do things for myself  during the week like Starbucks and Target. (To whomever decided to put the bucks IN the Target ... SHAME ON YOU. Now I have a ridiculous fetish to both!) But at the end of the day, I need the hero to play hero at home. And yet, I feel ashamed sometimes asking for his time. The great and powerful Jay. How dare Lois take some of his extremely valuable time!!!

But you know what. I can't feel ashamed. I have to feel that as half of the relationship, sometimes I need to take. Even if it's just a little. We ALL do. We need a minute to ourselves, for ourselves. To be alone, creative, read, work (on other things), grocery shop, sleep, pray, be human. Whatever it takes for us to continue to have the stamina and strength to continue to give. If you haven't, read The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein. (Have your box of tissues ready ladies and don't roll your eyes gents) It is a fantastic children's classic about a tree that gives and gives and gives until it can no longer give. If in the relationship, you only give and NEVER take, you will end up unhappy. And relationships aren't happy and productive if both parties aren't happy. They just aren't.

So I would like to change the connotation associated with The Take. It's more like Share. Both parties in a relationship have needs - Superhero or not - we do. If in a relationship, you NEED to have the ability to speak for yourself and remind your partner that you're there too and no matter how amazing they may be, they still need your support. And for you to support, you need for you. It doesn't get selfish until you ONLY focus on you and are constantly asking for more. It's not selfish when it's only on occasion and when truly needed.

I hope some day we can bring back The Take. I hope at some point in time we can realize that there are 2 parts to every relationship, and I don't mean give and take. There is one and the other. Both should be equal.

Sigh ... someday I won't be tied to the railroad tracks! ... Someday.

Hey Look! I Have Spare Time! ... Kinda

Hello! Yeah ... I didn't let it FULLY die. Welcome back to you too! So it's been like a year, I know get off my back! I've got some stuff goin on. So let me briefly update you and then get to why I'm picking back up.

So here's what's been happening.  My volunteering is up, my husbands extra curricular activities are at an all time high, we took a big family vacation last fall, my daughter turned 3, found out I was pregnant again (YAY!), then we found out it was TWINS (Double YAY!), trying to be the awful parent I am and make the beyond late decision to enroll said 3 year old in Pre-School (can't believe we got in), preparing for that, prepping for twins, hubby started a new position at work, trying to get another fundraiser done, run my house, not go insane, and yeah ... that about sums it up. That also does not include building relationships, being on a launch team for our new church campus that has consumed my whole summer and LOTS of family business.

WHEW! Make you exhausted?? I hope? ... No? Just me? I'm the laziest person alive? Yeah, yer pry right. Well ... that's my story and I'm stickin to it!! So what brings me back?? Well besides the fact that I think about blogging all the time. I really do. I miss writing my incoherent and rambling thoughts for friends and strangers to read, preferably aloud. But, 9 times out of 10, I'm either swamped with more pressing issues, or just trying to take a break. A genuine break. I think the decaf coffee I ordered from Starbucks today that was definitely mis-made WITH caffeine helps my productive attitude today, but this is something I just can't get off my mind lately.

The top (Unlucky) 13 things I just beyond words love about my kid. Here's where any male readers I have left leave. But seriously, stick around. Having a kid scares most men nearly to death. I'm actually really proud my husband didn't puke or pass out when we found out it was twins during the ultrasound. That was always his one stipulation of having kids, I wasn't allowed to have twins. HA! Twin girls no less. I'm not sure who's in more trouble - me (SO MUCH ESTROGEN!!!!) or my husband ... (SO VERY MUCH ESTROGEN!) We both might run away from ages 12-23. Oh look at that! I'm rambling ... But dudes, bare with me, you may learn something and realize kids are totally terrifying ... totally.

So what do I love about my kid. That she's adorable, and I get compliments everywhere we go. That she's smart, or independent, or well behaved or yadda yadda, yadda ... Same stuff ALL parents love about their kids. No. Those things are awesome, but not on this list. These are the little things. Those things every mom tells every mom to be to take time to notice. I have. And I can't stand it any more. I love my kid!

13. The hair on her legs. Super weird, I understand. But seriously, she is almost 3 1/2 and she's starting to get noticeable hair on her legs and it is DANG cute. Why? I literally have no idea. You could say hormones, but I loved it before I was even preggers. I just think about how she is getting to be such a big girl and one day she'll hate it and be embarrassed and we'll have to walk that road. But for now, it is sweet and innocent and just so stinking cute. Probably because she doesn't yet look totally like Chewbacca. (Spelled that right all by myself too by the way! No one is giving you brownie points Christie! Oooo Brownies!)

12. The way she eats. Oh my gosh! I sit and watch her eat almost every meal. Mostly because I'm with her nearly 24/7, but also because I know the Heimlich and I'm usually eating at the same time. So I sit and stare at her like the weirdo I am. I LOVE watching her little lips smoosh together and pout out when she eats. Her bottom lip pops out like she's pouting with every chomp and HAHAHA dang if it isn't adorbs!

11. Her handful of freckles. She's got about 8 or 9 little teeny tiny moles or freckles - depending on who you ask. They're all smaller than the head of a pin, and I think they are one of the cutest things I've ever seen. She has one by her eye which I think is inherited from my husband and his sister (each have a very small, cute freckle by one of their eyes) and I call it her sparkle. She also has one on the end of her nose and one on her ankle above her foot that are favorites as well. I don't know why, I will probably NEVER know why, but I think they are amazing. Probably because they are a part of her.

10. Her crazy hair. It's crazy for many reasons, 1. crazy how little of it she has for 3. B. Crazy for how out of control what little of it she has. My husband calls it "little old lady hair" - short, thin and curly. It is. We refer to it as our humometer. It lets us know if it's humid out or not by how tight the ringlets are. She never wants me to do it, doesn't like to wear headbands and will only stick with bows for about half a day. Typically she runs her hands through it wildly and she kinda looks like Albert Einstein meets Annie. When she runs they bounce and it makes me giggle almost every time. Most times I say I hate it because she looks like an unkempt, neglect case, but in reality that's how she rolls. Crazy and it works. People usually don't say "look at that hair", they say "look at those curls!" Hey ... all the power to ya kid, leave the styling for the rest of your life ... you're ... well yeah you're gonna need it.

9. The way she reads to herself. I can be anywhere in my house, and often, I can hear the sweet, tiny sound of her voice making up whatever words come to her through the book she's paging through. Sometimes the words correlate with the book, like characters, title, actions in the book, and sometimes not at all. Either way it's so stinkin adorable, I keep trying to record her, but you know, once they know you see them, it's all over. Sometimes she'll tell me to "go away." HA! Love it. Read on little reader!!

8. How she isn't like other kids. Now ... I don't ALWAYS love this about her. I'm a typical parent and worry about ... well everything. It bothered me for the first 2 years of her life that she wasn't EXACTLY like every other kid we met or had ever met. If you're not a parent yet, kid comparison is like fast food. It's the easiest thing in the world and really not good for you. EVERY parent will tell you not to do it and EVERY parent will inherently do it. We can't help ourselves but to see what other kids are doing and compare that (good or bad) with our own kid. If you say you've never compared you're either delusional or lying. Not judging! Just saying, every parent has compared at some point about some thing. My kid is a little weirdo. Sometimes it scares me but as we are getting older, I'm diggin it! Like how she doesn't play like most kids. She doesn't really pretend very much but she sure can entertain herself. (What do you think she's doing right now?! She doesn't know I snuck into the office a few minutes ago to keep writing. I'll get up when she realizes I'm gone and needs me.) She sings, she dances, she tries to climb trees. Sometimes she jumps around, sometimes she reads, sometimes she just spins or runs around. She's crazy and wild and I LOVE that she gets to be all those things. She also likes to tell random strangers completely random things about herself like - "look at my dress!" "I have a bow!" "See my purse?!" ... yeah honey, no one cares, but good for you! She's starting to get my social skills - Thank God!

7. How she's doing this arms crossed thing when she's "mad." Talk about hilarious. When she's "mad" (I put mad in quotes because she's not really mad, she's just being goofy and kinda pretending to be mad aka she thinks she's mad) she turns her back, crosses her arms across her chest and makes a Hm sound. HA! What a little diva! I usually start laughing which in turn makes her laugh - sometimes - and I either let her keep doing it or we talk it out - as much as you can with a 3 year old. I love how stubborn she is - sometimes - though. Cracks me up and reminds me of ... well me. This is gonna hurt in a few more years. Badly.

6. How it doesn't take much to make her laugh. She has been the laughiest baby/kid. Man. It doesn't take much to make her laugh or smile and I LOVE that. She thinks farts are funny, loves to be tickled, and has even told a joke! Her own joke! Wanna hear it? Yeah I know you don't but it's my blog and I'm gonna share it anyway. We were trying to learn to spell one day, and we were working on MOM. So I had those letters written on a piece of paper and one by one we rattle them off. When we get to the last M she thinks for like a second and goes P! AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! She purposely spelled MOP and laughed herself silly for about 45 minutes. Glad to see that's all I am to you kid ... a MOP. She cracked herself up about that on at least 2 other occasions as well. She's hilarious and I love love love to watch her laugh and laugh with her. Laughing is our favorite!

5. Her interest. She is a little wonder bug. She got that from her dad - Thank God! I love to watch her face as she investigates something. Whether it's a bug or a leaf or a new toy. She gets her fathers furrowed brow and goes to work. AWESOME. Go investigate little explorer! Figure out your world. Man it's so cute to watch the eyes, practically see the ole wheels turnin in the noggin and then out comes the tiny finger to poke. Love it.

4. The way she looks right after sleep. I really don't know what it is; maybe it's the fact that I've had time away from her, or that she's extra lovey, but the way she waits for me after waking up is one of my favorite parts about the day. It used to be in her crib, then she got a big girl bed and got out and would knock on her door, now she opens her door and waits for me at the top of the stairs. She still has a little bit of sleep in her eyes, not ready to talk yet, whackadoo hair and a forlorn longing look for her mommy on her face. UGH! LOVE! Sometimes this moment gets me so mommy I feel like I could explode with Love for her. We always hug, I usually tell her I love her and post potty (priorities) I ask how her sleep was. Some days I get a snuggle and some days I don't, but I always get a happy girl with hugs n kisses.

3. The way her breath smells after sleep. Oh my it's stinky. Everyone's breath is stinky after sleep. Hers is no exception. But there is just something about it. It's a sweet stinky. If I get post sleep snuggles I usually try to lean in close when she talks to get a whiff. Again, why? No idea. Really. I can try to say that it's the result of rest, or her, or I have no clue. All I know is I love it. Weird, crazy, yep, but can't be helped. Hers smells different and better than my husbands and definitely doesn't make me wanna throw up - so that could be part of it too. There's really no way to tell.

2. Her face. Yeah all parents think their kids are cute, I know. But I LOVE her face. Not that I think she is the "cutest" kid on the face of the planet, but just looking at her face. I love her cheeks and eyes, her teeny little nose. How soft her skin is. I could probably stare at her face up close for hours. Yes I need more date nights out, so sue me! But seriously, I just absolutely love everything about her face. There isn't one specific thing I like or makes her pretty ... it's everything. I like to rub her cheeks gently, when she lets me, and  pull her bangs off her forehead and just kiss her. Love.

1. When she tells me "Love you too Mommy." This is one every parent will tell you is the best. Because it is. No way around it. When you hear your child tell you they love you - forced or not - it is euphoria. I honestly have no idea why people do drugs. Have a kid, work hard to raise them, love, care for and protect them, and listen to them tell you they love you. High as a kite. Best feeling ever. Makes those moments when you want to leave them on the side of the road worth it. Those days when you can't stay out drinking or go where ever you want whenever you want. Wear a bathing suit the same way (for some of us - those of you freak moms who you can't tell you were ever pregnant and you get to walk around in a bikini ... good for you but you stink. That is all.) - all worth it. It is one of the things that keeps my world spinning. Keeps me motivated to do and be better. To have more patience with her, to try to teach her more, to just keep her wanting to tell me she loves me. Mostly because I know there will come a day when I hear "I hate you!" more than "I love you" so maybe I'm just stockpiling, but either way, it's the highlight of each day.

My button isn't perfect and I won't try to shove in your face all that she can do that maybe your kid can't - mostly because that drives me nuts. I brag about her, but in moderation and I try to use humility and humor when I do it. As a parent you can't help but be proud of milestones and big moments, at any age. You don't have to try to make your child (or make them OUT to be) the single greatest kid to ever walk the earth. (That spot has already been filled and no one can surpass the son of God ... sorry ... really not even worth trying to surpass him) But it goes with out saying, even if you don't believe in God, it's still impossible to tell if your kid is actually the greatest ever - so why do we try? Love your kid for the freaky little weirdo they are. Love that they always want to ride in the shopping cart you don't want them to ride in. Love that they ask for something to eat then refuse to eat it. (WHY?! You told me Peanut Butter ... EAT IT!) Love that they tell strangers the most random things that the strangers pry won't understand because they don't speak "the lingo." Love that little thing you got shadowing you! And come up with your own list of all the things you love about them. Above and beyond the obvious. All our kids are smart, all our kids are independent, all our kids are perfect (or hellions) etc ... but what about their eyes? That one tooth that came in funky? The nape of their neck? They way their toes wiggle just a little when they sleep? What about those little things ... we'll probably forget all that one day, but I hope I never do. It's one of the reasons I couldn't stop myself from blogging it.

I'm sorry if this post wasn't for you, but I'm not sorry that I take the time to notice and love the little things. I hope that if not now, some day when you have a little person in your life (in ANY capacity) you take the time for the little things ... like hairy legs and pouty lips.

This That And All Things Snowmenclature

Yeah, see that. See what I did there ... the puns and witty word plays are comin out already. Don't lie you like it!

But in all seriousness I'm hilarious. And I'm gonna hilarity you right into some info about SNOW ... the dreaded white stuff. The bane of everyone's existence. Except mine. I keep posting on Facebook about how I am the real life Elf ... You know the Will Ferrell movie about a human who was raised by elves at the North Pole and he always says everything's his favorite ... SNOW'S MY FAVORITE. When asked your favorite season most people say Spring or Summer due to sun and warm temperatures. I say all of em. It's one of the best things about living in Ohio, we experience all 4 seasons. There are attributes about each season I truly love. And in winter, my favorite is snow. So I get really really confused when people talk about how much they hate it?! Aww ... poor snow. It gets such a bad wrap!

Now I'm pretty sure I've narrowed down where my love for snow comes from. I spent my entire childhood enjoying Northern Michigan. And when I say Northern Michigan I don't mean Detroit. I mean, woods, dirt roads, I mean snow plows?, I mean you take a snowmobile into town ... NORTHERN Michigan. Every year we would go up for winter break and some extended weekends to enjoy the wintery wooded bliss. And when I was a kid, snow was always associated with something good. School closings, Snowmobiling, downhill skiing, sledding, ice skating, fires, hot cocoa ... FUN!!! And the adults caring for me (my parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles) had all been doing the same things since THEY were kids and were extremely proactive in the "get out in the snow and have fun" attitude. Maybe that's where everyone else in the world went awry ... no one ever told them snow is FUN!

That being said, I've spent a many a Christmas getting thick socks and mittens for pro LONGED fun in SNOW! But one of my most favorite things about snow is something I've learned in various science classes over my long scholastic ... er I mean DISTINGUISHED -- there that sounds better -- distinguished scholastic career. So most people know that clouds contain moisture. And when that moisture builds up, it is released from said clouds and that's how we experience precipitation. Now I understand that I'm going to have 8 meteorologists contact me on Facebook to let me know that that is incorrect and there's more to the story, but for Blog's sake let's role with it. So when air temperatures reach around 32 degrees ... I said around, alright! Blogging is not an exact science.  Right, 32 degreesish ... the moisture in those clouds freezes and when released comes down as SNOW! ... Yep ... always gonna put SNOW! in CAPS with an exclamation point ... get used to it. Now here's the REALLY cool part ... and for those of you who know me -- which let's face it is all of you -- science and I don't get along. We never have since it did me that solid in the womb ... and to be honest it took a few short cuts ... WHY AM I NOT SMARTER?!?! But I digress ... I'm not a science girl, is my point, and this gets me geeked up. When water freezes it crystallizes. And every crystal that has ever formed is different. Think about that ... Every snowflake that has ever fallen in the history of ever (several billion tons of snow? Give or takeish?) is not like the others. I'm gonna let that sink in ... Just like people, God creates every snowflake differently and beautifully. I've never heard anyone ever see a snowflake and say ... DANG that's hideous! (Some people yes ... snowflakes no.) There is certainly a significant amount of beauty, cleanliness, and calm during snowfall. To just sit at a window and watch snow fall is one of the most serene activities. So that is first and foremost what I love about snow.

Now I want to talk about why you shouldn't completely freak out when it does SNOW! Most of us have seen or heard about that video clip of that guy ranting about bread and milk. And when I was in Toledo, Ohio this past weekend, they surely displayed that video in real life to the fullest. (Do people not understand that milk will go bad whether or not there is a snomageddon?????? Don't stock up on milk.) So here's why you shouldn't panic in snow. A. If you're reading this you MOST LIKELY live in an area in or around snow ... lets say OHIO ... perhaps. It's winter ... we're gonna get snow. Whoa ... I just straight up blew your mind! Yeah I know I do that sometimes ... habit. But people always act like it's a giant surprise. Like they've never heard of this ... "SNOW" before. It comes every year ... and IF you're an Ohioan ... it comes for a majority of the year ... yeah we can get snow in October and make it last to April! BOOM ... SNOW! (And orange barrels) THAT'S WHAT OHIO DOES! (In case you're counting on your fingers like I am, that leaves 5 months we don't usually get snow) So people ... prepare! And I certainly don't mean on milk ... that's just annoying. I mean on proper winter apparel and know how. Gotta keep your mind sharp Jack! (I didn't steal that from Duck Dynasty at all ... #probablygonnagetsuedbya&e)

So what DO you need to know about snow ... more than just my ridiculous obsession with it. First and foremost you need to know more than what the local weather tells you about frostbite. Seriously. Local media is PAID to be dramatic which in turn makes people panic. Drama sells ... just ask AMC ... #walkingdead ... #idon'thavetwitter ... So the more dramatic the news the higher the ratings. Now I'm not saying they don't know what they're talking about or that they're ALWAYS wrong ... but I do know that weather people make the most money and keep their jobs longer than anyone else I've ever seen being so wrong all the time ... #blizzardbill ... So when chatting with people and they're talking about how cold it is and it only takes 5 minutes to get frostbite in these temperatures it makes me wonder why I don't have frostbite?! Seriously, I had my kids outside for half an hour today ... we're all fine ... and really happy to be out of the house to be honest. So here's what I've found from the NATIONAL Weather Service ... Frostbite Chart ... Now you all know I'm no genius ... hate you science ... but I DO know how to read a chart. With weather conditions where I live currently being -8.8 Degrees with winds at 6 mph ... it FEELS like -22 Degrees. (When weather people say FEELS like that means how long it takes heat to leave the skin making your body feel temperature ... read that somewhere ... today actually ... in my quest to learn about frostbite ... neat ...) So according to this chart ... from THE National Weather Service (that's a .gov in there you saw, it's a government website, not me telling you this) ... I can be out for 30 minutes and most likely will not get frostbite. THIRTY minutes ... in -22 degrees. That's a long time. Contrary to extremely popular belief, if you go outside, you won't die. Just ask the 50 other people coming in to work out where I work right now ... I even heard one patron say ... "My daughter went out today, I said what are you nuts? They said you're not supposed to go out." My thought, then why are YOU here and HOW did you get here if you didn't go out sir ... just saying.

Which brings me to my next question. Why is everyone so worried about their kids getting frostbite that they can't ride a heated bus for 20 minutes? Where I live they cancelled school (4 days in advance) for what the news says is snow ... but we have no new snow ... and is really closed for cold temperatures ... but kids only need to be exposed for minutes at a time? Does that not fall on the parents to dress your children appropriately? As a parent who willingly took her kid out today (Granted in warmer temps, but still) it's my job to tell her 2 things -- 1. if you don't leave your scarf up we're going inside ... and 2. when she's older it's MY job to tell her she'll get frostbite and die and show her pictures of frostbite to terrify her into never taking her mittens off til I tell her. Not suing a school for making my kid stand outside for 3 minutes to go learn. I'm kinda not sure where society is headed these days. And PS ... it's OKAY to close school ... it is NOT okay to close school 4 days in ADVANCE. You wake up, it's still cold, close school again. Repeat. It's not hard. What happens when it's 32 degrees one of the days you closed school ... ? Anyone? Yep. It's chilly out, no doubt about it, but you won't die. Frostbite has GOT to be one of THE MOST preventable things out there. (Learn more about frostbite here) And the best thing to do, aside from keeping your time spent outside to a minimum, is dress appropriately. Uuuuhhh Scarf anyone?? It's like people have forgotten what it's like to dress warm in cold. I've heard several people say 5 minutes ... 5 minutes if you're in a bikini probably. But if you cover exposed skin and as yet to be stated, dress appropriately, you'll be fine. How in the world has anyone EVER explored the arctic circle, lived in Alaska, or climbed Everest. HOW? Bottom line, you're not gonna die, you can in fact leave your house. And as long as you're covered up, you won't get frostbite in 5 minutes.

Dress appropriately?? How? Well ... your superhero has arrived YET again ... you're welcome ... please hold your applause. Here's how to dress in cold weather. Layers of loose warm clothing. Unless you're that absolutely insane runner I saw a few days ago out running in JUST running shorts, a long sleeve shirt and a stocking cap ... skin tight clothing doesn't allow for warm air to stay close to your skin. And in case you're unfamiliar, that's where frostbite happens ... your skin. Don't cram your feet into those boots that were too small 7 years ago. Tight spaces don't allow for good blood circulation and can help frostbite develop faster. Same goes for your hands. Wear mittens yo. Gloves were cool in the '90's but it's time to bring the mit back. When your fingers stay together instead of being separated, they stay warmer. Wear a hat that completely covers your ears. And scarves ... for heavens sake wear a scarf. This is cold people not rocket scientology! I don't care if you don't think it's cool, or fun, or if you don't like it. I'm tired of hearing you complain about how cold it is and go outside with a naked head. So wear your dang scarf! And I suppose I should pry put this in here too ... wear a jacket. Yeah turns out coats keep you ... ummm ... what's that word, oh yeah warm. I have to put a plug in here for Columbia jackets ... I have had the same coat for 10 years ... and I SWEAT when I wear it with a t-shirt in the winter. I RARELY bundle up when I put it on because I typically get too warm. And the great part about Columbia, they aren't NEARLY as expensive as North Face ... and my Jacket just says Columbia on it ... it's not a NR90xTripleZ2000 ... it's a coat, not a car. So go buy yourself a good winter coat. Okay I THINK I touched on everything ... if you have questions ... you know where to stalk me. OR! You can try this crazy new fangled thing called the Internets ... they let me use it, so ... ya know ... they'll pry let you too!

And lastly but most definitely not leastly. The other big complaint I hear about winter and SNOW! is driving in it. So let me first say that I've done my very fair share of driving in NASTY snowy conditions. I said SNOW is my favorite, not driving in it. There's a difference. But I was in outside sales for almost 2 years, I've driven in snow ... in a G6 ... not the plane, the car. The ole front wheel drive sleigh! Because lets be honest, Pontiac is about as front wheel as it gets. But let me give you some tips I used and or figured out while sliding my way around for work. First of all ... focus on yourself. Don't worry about what other people are doing ... we've ALL seen that one guy in his 8 ton Suburban blasting down the highway at 900 miles an hour getting all ticked at everyone else trying not to die. "Claaaark, I don't wanna spend the holiday's dead!" Don't worry about that guy ... let him tail you, or flip you off, or honk or whatever ... you focus on you. Especially if you're an anxious driver like I am. Next, start slowing by gently applying pressure, and then GENTLY pumping your breaks on upcoming stops. This will significantly diminish if not eliminate sliding. When you pump, do it slowly and gently about every 1-2 seconds. You don't need to push it all the way to the floor first try. And remember to start slowing down much earlier than you normally would. That being said, don't try to accelerate too quickly, coming off a stop or through a turn. That will make you slip and slide the most. So don't think, "yep I can make it before that car gets here" because no you can't. Or maybe yes you can but you just slammed into that other dude. Wait until you have enough time to safely and slowly make your move. Carry kitty litter in your trunk. Serious. Kitty litter is really good for a lot of things besides cat poo, but one of the best uses is to help give your tires traction if you ever get stuck. Nothin worse than spinnin a hole in some guys yard ... yeah I definitely did that once. Dump some litter on front and back of the tires that are struggling and "rock" your car by switching it quickly from drive to reverse while giving it a little gas. In addition to the kitty litter, it's always a good idea to keep a car emergency kit, an extra blanket, gloves and a bottle of water in your trunk. True story, a woman I used to go to school with had her car break down with below 0 temps. It happens in real life and with no heat coming out of your car, it's a good idea to have somethin in your trunk ... both figuratively and literally. Don't forget the straighter your tires are when you drive, the more traction they have. My amazing and incredibly studly husband taught me that years ago. Makes sense when you think about it, but honestly how many of us actually think about it. Yeah. So when you approach a turn or slippery areas, try to ensure your tires are as aligned as possible in the direction you want to go. This includes being stuck. Don't turn your tires unless you're turning them to a straight position. Turning your wheels can dig your hole deeper and give your tires less traction. So just stay straight until you get out and then proceed to turn in any direction you need to head. Finally, when switching lanes, it can be tricky with all that "mashed potato" slush left over from where the plows don't get. Here's what I do for a safe maneuver every time. Turn on turn signal ... shocked ya with that step 1 didn't I? Then let off gas completely. Gently and slowly shift your car into the next lane. When completely clear of slush or car has returned to driving straight, resume pushing gas pedal slowly. You don't want to gas or break during a transition like that because it's much easier and more likely your car can slip. When in doubt ... let off the gas!

And here's the obvious, but maybe not because it happens. Last 2 things you need to do before winter driving. One. Make sure the tires on your car are in fact winter tires. Good tires can and do make all the difference when driving in crazy conditions. And B. Make sure your car has gas. Not just for long trips, but all the time. People want to run their cars as low as possible all the time, but this is more dangerous in winter because you will have a much more difficult time walking for gas.

So ... people ... don't freak out and hate up on snow. It's not snow's fault! We have brains and we can think but usually don't. Snow is just beautiful, sparkling and magnificent. Don't fear snow. Don't hate it. Accept it. Accept it for one of God's most amazing gifts. It is so majestic and brilliant and maybe ... just MAYBE this post will make you look at snow in a whole new light next time. There's NO fun like SNOW fun!!! ;) ENJOY winter everyone! ENJOY!